Supple Towel Cuddle

How to shart into my outstretched eyelids!

Look up "what causes magnetism?"

You'll find modern physicists saying: "That's a dumb question. We don't know, but that's a dumb question."

You'll find thousands of conspiracy theorists who--like Copernicans back in the day, Aristotelians back in the day before that, and Pythagoreans back in the day before that day--hate mainstream scientists for the incestuous zombies that they are.

You'll find genii the world round--even Asians--who've tried publishing papers remodeling all of physics around a universal theory of magnetism, even going so far as to abandon the idea that gravity is its own force in favor of the idea that magnetism can account for it.

Me, I like these theories, and have after much grappling come to support them... whatever "support" means, since I'm still just sort of doing my day to day most the time.

The thing is, I think lots of things feel rightly compared to magnetism:
-- When I draw out a color spectrum, ROYGBIV, neatly gradiated, the colors just sort of look right together, like correctly-laid-out magnets that would "repel" being in any other orientation.
-- When I listen to three part harmonies in music, the notes just stick together by themselves, creating a beautiful sandwich my ears love gobbling.
-- When my eyes lock on an object in my field of view that moments before was blurry and double-visioned out of focus, the quick focusing feels rightly described as magnetic. This is also the exact same mechanism that allows me to do Magic Eye pictures, unlike many people whom I proudly scoff at. (I also do this with any side-by-side objects that are roughly identical to make a third, uniquely 3D phantom object in the middle. But I have yet to meet anyone else who does this; am I the only one?)
-- When the constant needs of the nerve endings in my skin, my muscles, my hungry belly, my eyes, the needs that, for instance, never allow me me to be permanently comfortable with how I'm sitting or lying or standing, all sort of coincide in my head in an all-over-all-at-once-awareness and, like a bunch of magnets stuck together to form one big relatively-strong magnet, end up as a single representation in my head, a single polyphonic chord in my one-track mind that hears all of my desires and none of them.
-- When I squeeze up all closity close close to my girlfriend. Close is better than far. Same goes for my dogs, except with relatively little pelvic thrusting.
-- Gravity = Magnetism. (Convince me otherwise, totally convince me, leave no stone unturned, and I *will* let you shart into my outstretched eyelids.)

Affectionately yours,
Towel

Posted by suppletowelcuddle at September 15, 2008 11:30 PM